Eevory had a rough night last night. No matter how many times she wakes up at night, she still is ready to get up at the same time. So, even though she woke up at 1, at 2, at 3, at 4 and at 5, at 6:30 she was up smiling and giggling ready to start her day. I, however, was a complete disaster so the practice did not happen this morning.
Tom came home for lunch and rocked Mia to sleep so that I could practice. Both girls slept long enough for my practice and for me to do the dishes!
I was so out-of-it this morning that I didn't even cook dinner. I missed the smell of tasty food simmering for hours when I got home with the girls after spending the day at Nana and Papa's house. I think tomorrow I'll make a big batch of lentil and kale soup.
The burned area is peeling like crazy and it actually hurting more today that yesterday. I think new, raw skin is being exposed. I think I'm very close to recovered.
A friend of mine made a couple of comments yesterday that really pissed me off. I spent a good part of my practice today fuming about them. I thought about posting a ranting blog post about it, but ultimately decided against it.
She made a comment intimating that I wasn't a real lawyer. I assume she meant that because I'm not currently practicing other than helping the occasional friend out with a divorce or custody issue. I decided that she just said that because she's self-concious about her career.
The second comment she made was that I'd never be able to afford a private school that she'd like to send her kids to. Even though I've told her several times that I wouldn't send my kids to that school, she keeps forgetting. In any case, I resented being told that I'd never be able to afford it. Why would she feel that she can make predictions on my future earning potential? Or my husband's? The tuition would have been less than 15% of my last salary, so we probably could afford it now if I was working. Again, I decided her comment was about her own anxieties about her family's future.
I think when my friend makes these comments it says much more about her than it does me. I don't think I'm even registering on her radar most of the time. She has a lot of her own problems to work through and doesn't have time to think about mine. I'm not hurt by this. If anything, I'm relieved. I'd rather not have a third party second guessing my life choices.
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It is tough when other people pass on their insecurities. I find that when it rattles me, it usually helps illuminate my own insecurities as well. In the end, experiences like that act as a mirror for seeing deeper inside. It is a great gift when a friend can help to bring that illunination, even if it pisses us off at the time :-)
ReplyDeleteSing it, Sister! Yep. I definitely have plenty of insecurities about whether I'm making the right decision by giving up my career for a few years. So, yeah, Tammy. 100% agreement.
ReplyDeleteI'm in the same place with my career. I have come to feel great about it most of the time, but once in a while, fear creeps in. I had a big step in telling my old PhD adivisor that I may try to find a new position in what I used to do or I may just work on building a Yoga business. Since she has had kids, she has become a lot more acepting of alernatives to the academic career path too.
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